Today did not go well or to plan at all. First off I had hardly any sleep. I couldn’t sleep where I felt so ill so I had got up and gone downstairs to try and take my mind off the fact I was feeling so sick. I sat on our sofa downstairs, watching various videos on YouTube. I even tried some dry crackers to see if that worked but nope. I had a constant horrible taste in my mouth that I could not shift.
At about 1.30am I headed upstairs into Bella’s room as that’s where the TV is. I felt tired but I didn’t want to fall asleep on the sofa. So in bed with Bella I ended up with Netflix on, so if I fell asleep at least I fell asleep in a nice comfortable bed.
Bella stirred when I got into bed with her. Every now and then she’d wake up and talk to me before snuggling back down. My head was pounding by this point so I took some co codamol in the hopes it would either get rid of my headache and help me get to sleep or throw the pills up and whatever crap was making me feel ill. I think the pair of us finally fell asleep properly at about 3.30am so it seems the pills kicked in and did some good.
I heard Daly wake up at 4am and get ready for work. My chest was starting to hurt. It starting like indigestion in the centre of my chest and like a weight on my chest and then it turned to a squeezing pain in the right side of my chest just the same as when I had my gallbladder and gallstone attacks. Which is weird as I had my gallbladder removed nearly a year to the day.
I was trying to rid the pain out – it comes in waves but as the attack goes on the pain becomes worse and worse. Obviously as I only took co codamol an hour ago I can’t take anymore of that. When I had my gallbladder and ended up in A and E with chest pains they had given me some suppositories to get pain relief into my system quicker. And just the time I was hunting to see if I still had any was the point Daly went out the front door to work. Not good, Bella was trying to climb all over me while I’m looking for some strong pain killers.
Now as I was in such pain and no stronger pain killers to be found and also at home with a toddler with no back up I went back to my trusty gallbladder relief position. Curled up on my side on the bathroom floor. The pain was getting more intense with every wave so I bit the bullet and rang 111. I didn’t want to but the attack was getting worse everytime and I just wanted someone to tell me yep your ok, it’s nothing serious.
I’d shut the gate on Bellas room so she couldn’t be jumping all over me. I think she knows when I’m in pain and wants to look after me but doesn’t quite know how to do it. Shes not gentle, she just wants to protect me from whatever is hurting me.
Now my 111 call did not end how I expected. Instead of go to your doctors or come and visit urgent care or minor injuries. Nope they told me they were sending out an ambulance to check me over. I was instructed not to use my phone to call anyone though incase the ambulance service needed to get in touch with me. So instead I text Dalys dad and then Daly just to let them know what was going on. But with the ambulance coming this now meant I had to get Bella downstairs and try and get her ready incase we then had to go to hospital. Sadly that wasn’t an easy task. I managed to get Bella and myself downstairs during a break in the pain but when I tried to sort Bellas bag out the pain struck again so I ended up back on the floor.
Bless, Bella was a bit gentler now. I think she realised mummy was in bad pain. I was lead on the floor in the entrance to the dining room. Bella went and found her large colouring sheet she had got from McDonalds and laid it on the floor in the hallway so we could colour. I tried my best colouring with my left hand but it’s been a while since I’ve used my left over my right.
I’d been asked to keep an eye out for the ambulance it’s a little hard though when your lead on the floor but I’d opened the door for them just like when I’d rung the ambulance for mum. Bella tried shutting the door but luckily I’d put it on the latch so all she could do was push it to.
Finally the ambulance turned up. I felt so bad coz Bella needed her nappy changed but the pain wouldn’t subside enough for me to actually do that simple task. The ambulance men tried to check me over. One sat in the dining room and asked me all those important questions like name, age, address, doctors, what’s wrong. I was still curled up on the floor at this point because it was the only comfortable place. Sadly they wanted me to move and sit on the sofa so they could examine me. I did not want to move I was not impressed especially as not being curled in a ball made the pain worse.
I eventually moved on to the sofa next to Bella so they could check me over. Bella was happily watching Peppa Pig but got quite concerned when the paramedic started taking my blood pressure and oxygen levels. I had to reassure her I was ok. And that the man was trying to help mummy. I was having harsh chest pains at this point I could feel myself shaking, I was sweating, I was dizzy and by the time the pain had eased I was exhausted and just wanted to sleep. Apparently my temperature was slightly elevated as was my heart rate but my blood pressure was through the floor. This panicked the paramedics slightly and they announced I needed to go to hospital.
Now Bella couldn’t come in the ambulance with us so I had to make calls to see if anyone could come get her and have her while were at the hospital and also get her dressed, find her stuff, feed her etc. I rang Dalys parents and luckily they answered and said they would be there as soon as possible. Next call was to Daly. If I’m going to hospital I need someone with me. I had also tried Rachel to see if she could have Bella even if it was only for an hour just so I could go to hospital but she was already on her way to work.
It felt like the longest wait ever for Daly and his parents to turn up. Especially as I was starting to feel better, the chest pain had eased and wasn’t coming back as badly. I have so bad for the paramedics. I felt like I was wasting their time but they said they needed to find out what was causing the pain even if it had stopped now. Their panic about my obs had eased up as everything had gone back to normal now. One of the paramedics said that it must be my bodies reaction to pain. So as everyone used to joke, I do have a very low pain tolerance. Although it’s not much of a joke because it’s the reason Bella ended up in the NICU and I had to have an emergency C section. My body just couldn’t handle labour.
I got in the ambulance and off we went to the hospital. The inside if the ambulance was slightly different to the one mum was in when she was rushed to hospital but it was still an ambulance. The ride was silent. They didn’t even have the radio on, it sucked. Daly was following behind in our car so he could meet me at the hospital. I still just wanted some painkillers. Do they not understand what pain does to me even through they’d just stated it themselves.
We made it to the hospital and out we got. They didn’t even help me out of the ambulance, you know that would have been nice. We went into Urgent Care and the paramedic checked me in. I curled up on a chair in the waiting room and text Daly to let him know where I was. He turned up quickly and I was able to snuggle up on him, not for long though because soon I was called in by the nurse to have my obs done again.
All my obs were normal and they asked for the delightful urine test. About 15 minutes later I was called back into the room to see if anything had shown up in the urine test and so I could discuss everything that had happened this morning for them to decide which part of the emergency department I should go to. Low and behold I was sent round to the doctors at the hospital as nothing was happening now. How to make me feel like I made the whole thing up. I mean even though I was brought in by ambulance and treated by paramedics I felt like one of those people that make stuff up for attention and was lying about everything.
Round we went to the doctors with this wad of paperwork I’d been given. I guess it was all the notes the ambulance crew had taken and any other paperwork the doctor would need.
In the waiting area of the doctors I curled up on Dalys lap and went to sleep. I still felt sick but mostly I was exhausted. I just wanted to lay down and sleep.
We must have waited for about 3 hours before I was seen. Not too bad considering how busy it was. They had people lining up outside and had no chairs left so people were stuck standing. Thankfully we had managed to find some chairs hidden in the corner so we couldn’t be disturbed.
Eventually I was called in and it finally felt like I was being listened to and wasn’t making it all up but the doctor couldn’t really do much. She had a feel of my stomach to see if she could feel anything but she said it was all fine now. As this wasn’t the first one of these attacks she prescribed me some medication for acid reflux to see if that helps where the pain starts in the centre of my chest before moving to the right side. Apart from that the only advice she could offer was to see my own doctor in a few weeks if it was no better.
Finally and eventful morning that had started at 4.30am was coming to a close at 11am. I felt gross as I left the hospital. Where I’d come over all hot and sweaty when I was in pain made me feel horrible and the fact I was wearing pyjamas with bean juice on them from Bellas dinner the night before, no bra, flip flops and an oversized hoodie while hanging on a blanket, I just wanted to go home and take a shower. Hopefully soon I’d feel a little bit more human.
The rest of the day was far less eventful thankfully and Dalys parents watched Bella all day for us so I could just rest up. Hopefully I dont have another attack for a while. It hurts too much.
Love CiCi x