Get well please – 18th February 2019

I swear Bella is getting worse. She seems even more ill and grumpy today. Bless she was still half asleep when I got her dressed. We’d arranged to go see one of Mum’s friends today. Meant I was getting out of the house, to be granted not fr, and talking to someone else. A few of mum’s friends had recently text me to see how we were doing. And I’ve been completely honest – not great. I’m trying but it doesn’t seem like it’s working. I mean my mum was a huge part of my life. I was her carer solely for the last 4 months of her life and before that I still did a hell of a lot. I was her taxi, her sounding board, her cook, her errand runner, and her pharmacy. Dad did bits but wasn’t around much. So often it was Mum, Bella and me. Of course I have my little family of Daly, Bella and I. And there was my sister who would join us for things, and occasionally my dad was around.

But even before mum was ill, as much as I always seemed like a Daddy’s girl it was me and mum against the world. I’d come home every lunch time during sixth form to spend it with my mum, my mum was the only one who came to my dance competitions, I’d ring my mum at least twice a day while I was at uni, I’d check in on her when I was working or away on holiday. She was my shopping buddy. To be honest my mum was my world, my everything. I think I only fell out with mum once and that killed me. To know she wasn’t talking to me. I mean she hated some of the things I did – carnival being the main one but she still made sure I looked ok, listened to me rant about the day, and come to every carnival she could to support me.

Anyways this wasn’t suppose to turn into a downer of how I miss my mum. Back to our day. I got Bell dressed in a cute little dungaree set I bought only to find she seems too long in the body. Bella is still in 9-12 months clothing occationally going up into 12-18 months. I had bought this set in a 18-24 months thinking she could grow into it and carry on wearing during the summer. Man was I wrong, every time she sat down the poppers burst open.I thought maybe it’s because she was wearing tights under neither but nope taking them off didn’t solve the problem.

So we headed off to mum’s friend’s, luckily they only live a ten minute walk away. Bella spent the walk pointing out all the dogs that were going for walks across the park. There were some pretty ones.

We got to mum’s friend’s and we sat down and had a cuppa. She had found Bella a sketch book so she could do some drawing and put CBeebies on for her. Bella discovered her brass horse and carriage and she sat on the carpet playing with them.

We chatted about all sorts of things – mum, Bella’s birthday, art group, the church, her grandchildren. It was nice to just get out and chat especially with someone who was close to mum. Bella was very interested in the ornaments in the corner of the room but she managed to find and weight and decided to bang this against the display cabinet so out came the iPad so to stop her from breaking anything.

We stayed there for two hours chatting, drinking tea and having a biscuit before we decided to set of home. Bella was helped down the garden steps by mum’s friend while I followed with the pram and then we said goodbye.

Bella was quite happy to walk home, she has this thing about walking up to peoples front doors however. Bella found an alley she wanted to explore so we took a little detour on the way home. There’s so many alleys round our way it’s unbelievable

She also came across some pretty flowers in one of the grass sections on our route. Just before we bumped into another of mum’s friends. She just kept dancing round in all the flowers. I think spring is on it’s way.

She walked most of the way home but she kept wanting to cross the road so I ended up popping her back in the pram. Although she was wanted to cross roads she was very sensible about it. She would walk up to the curb and then stop and wait for me, however if I told her we weren’t going that way she’d just continue to stand there looking for cars. After the last little tantrum because I’d told her we weren’t crossing the road – which resulted in us both sitting on the floor, she ended up in the pram.

When we got home, Bella was grumpy and whiny. I took her dungarees off her as even though the poppers kept coming undone they’ve also managed to rip. She’s still not great, very snuffly and seemed like shes got a temperature. We watched the Little Mermaid snuggled up on the sofa. That’s Bella’s favourite film so I was hoping it might make her feel better.

While watching her film she found a box of chocolates I had been given and helped herself. She just sat on the sofa trying all the different flavours. She must of liked them all because I have no chocolates left.

The day was a bit like yesterday, one minute Bella was happily playing the next she was snuggled up with me. I’ve been freezing all day and my chest had been hurting so I’ve been curled up on the floor under a blanket.

Bella found my camera and decided she wanted to have a go at taking photos. So I showed her how to use it but I’m not sure if she actually managed to take any photos. She tries to look through the lens rather than at the digital screen. But she does look cute walking round with my camera.

I got a burst of energy when I was cooking so I actually hand made our chips again and even tidied the dinning room. Bella was extremely helpful and even laid the table for me.

Well we’ve had a bath, at least Bella did. She was covered in shepherds pie and now she is trying on her ballet outfit. Hopefully in a day or two she’ll have her cardigan to complete it.

Night all and let’s see what adventures tomorrow holds

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